The art of reciprocation has been used by many leaders to influence people. It is covert and effective. Assume someone gives you a gift or does a favor for you without asking for something in return, doesn’t that trigger a feeling of obligation from you to return the favor? Yes it does. Well it is the same if someone shares with you something about himself/herself. On an unconscious level you would ask yourself why that person is sharing personal information with you if he doesn’t trust you. So you would open up and start reciprocating building connection and trust to that person. One technique you can use is to reveal something about yourself casually and then turn the conversation back to her. Coupled with good questions, she would usually reciprocate and start talking about herself.
Men and women flirt differently, for different reasons and expect different outcomes to the flirting. However, if you put aside that outcome and flirt just to be friendly you are opening yourself to different opportunities. You may well end up with a new lover but if that doesnít work out you could meet someone who becomes a good friend and who knows who she might introduce you to. Keep your options open.
After you have exchanged glances and smiles across a room and you are fairly confident that SHE thinks that she might like to get to know you better, send a drink to her. But remember that ALL you are buying is a drink. Donít expect her to fall at your feet. Sometimes it is nice just to send someone a drink, watch when she receives it and smile, then look away ñ look back again later to show your interest.
If you find yourself invited to her table, keep you mind on the conversation and not on getting a date with her. Most women want to know what kind of person they are going out with long before they actually go out with them. Make an effort to get to know her and give her the opportunity to get to know you before diving in for a date.
Do not ever approach two women in the same group. No woman wants to feel like second best. Refrain from approaching one after another in the same group. You look like a loser and the women may think you are desperate and looking for any port in a storm. Even if you are, donít show it.
When you compliment a woman make certain that it is a genuine compliment. Thereís nothing worse than someone giving out a load of overblown lines. Everyone has something great about them, notice that and compliment them genuinely.
Do not ever put your hands on a woman uninvited. Some women have no objection to ëtouchy feelyí encounters, others are horrified by it. Respect the person until you have had the opportunity to know more about her. Touching can be a lovely flirty action, but should be confined to the arms or resting the hand just above the arms and NOT touching, until you know more. Test the personal space by moving closer, noticing the reactions then moving back a little to remove the threat.
Respect yourself at all times. Women always fall for men who are that little bit unreachable. Don’t hover or grovel or act desperate. Think of yourself as special and know what you deserve the very best.
Sometimes, knowing what youíre looking for in a woman can be quite difficult. And if youíre one of them, donít get discouraged. It truly isnít as difficult as you may think to find the right woman for you.
The very first thing you must do is resign to be very open-minded. You need to cast aside all the standards that you may have been using and start from scratch. Forget what all your buddies say is attractive. Never mind what you see in the lingerie commercials on television. Youíll want to start with the very basics of what makes two people compatible, not two lovers, but two people in general, in order to find what kind of person works for you.
In order to find out what you are really looking for in a woman, you need to take the time to consider the complete person, not just the body. You need to take into consideration things like personality, interests, ambition and then looks. Youíre probably wondering why I listed those traits in the order I did.
If you consider looks first it will tend to cloud your judgment on all the other traits. Men tend to be very easily visually stimulated. For this reason, what excites them at first sight tends to be what they think they want.
However, if you consider what you want in the other areas, the looks may not be so important. You may find that a woman with a great personality that likes football and racing as much as you do and who takes her career as a human resources director seriously, but who happens to be a brunette with only an average build, would suit you just fine. Personality, intelligence, ambition, sense of humor and interests play a much bigger role in attraction than just physical appearance.